The basic tenets of this order that
Exist whichever taunts me. What,
How, and Why at all of all that is extant,
Making me skeptical as why this subsists
And how at all it thrives shaking the root
Of credulity; making me simply wonder
How can I ever read or interpret this order?
AMMA! My ever troubled mind, this day
This very moment is overjoyed.
While partaking the feed steeped in
THY motherly love and care; gives a
Feel that the fare served to me
Savors like the very divine nectar.
My mind delightfully filled in THY love,
And the heart rejoicing unawares; making
Me wonder is this the elixir of life
To pass through this earthly sojourn
For my little self ever bogged down.
Thus disclosing the meaning of this
Mundane life and revealing the
‘HOW’, ‘WHY’ and ‘WHAT’ of this
Order that ever subsists with little pause.
Every morsel fed pulsates with
THY divine touch, thus enhancing me
My every utterance echoes with THY feel,
Could it be that THOU art ever with
Me prompting, moving and verily
Causing my every foot to fall on this earth?
Oh! AMMA ever bowed THEE in abject submission.
AMMA cherishes feeding her children ever and always. To perpetuate this process of feeding the devotees, deemed endearingly by AMMA as the very children the ANNAPURNALAYAM is committed and dedicated forever. Till now countless individuals took their meal here with little distinction of caste, creed, race, religion and language with little bar and no exception. Such universal feeding process is institutionalized by AMMA through ANNAPURNALYAM, deemed verily the sacred shrine by one and all, ever dishing out food, as AMMA’S PRASADAM. To serve food hunger is only the condition and little else.
Even so AMMA during HER physical form personally fed some of the devotee children many a time. AMMA loved giving such feed whenever possible to her children. The food is delectable and the experience is the delight of one’s lifetime for the subject who is fed by AMMA personally. Such is the unique, sweet reminiscence the subject ever recalls and cherishes during his time on this earth.
Here the truth is this is not a mere feeding by AMMA. Only superficially it appears so. On the subtle plane, it is AMMA’S induction of the individual for a better or enhanced life from that moment on. This brings or works a silent change from within the person though not immediately perceptible.
Slowly, unknowingly the individual’s deficiencies are remedied. His frailties lessened kindling a new awareness within. Gradual, internal transformation takes place for the person over a period of time. Though, such a process is not apparently perceived at the very moment.
Here AMMA feeds Brother Raju personally during the year 1984, which is a year before AMMA attained eternity. Here mention needs be made though we did not realize at that crucial moment AMMA gave a personal touch, care and caress to most of the devotee children before biding HER final adieu entering the inner sanctum of the shrine ANASUYA SWARALAYAM in June 1985. Such is AMMA’S lasting tender legacy from the physical form. Thus HER motherly love is perpetuating.
As already conveyed, this works up a change in the inner self of the subject. Brother Raju is intrigued by the basics of this order and the mundane existence. His mind questions the ‘WHY’, ‘WHAT’ and ‘HOW’ of this cosmic order, the creation that moves on relentlessly.
In the ancient wisdom, all such schooling begins with ‘Panchakshari’. That is “Om Namasivaya”. Closely follows in its wake the ‘Ashtakshari’, “Om Namo Narayanaya”. The readers not exposed to these concepts shall appreciate that in the vernacular these quotes or chants are restricted to five and eight alphabets respectively though not verily so in the English rendering. These are the initiating chants that begin the person’s education; if closely followed leading him into the higher, spiritual realms from the merely temporal.
AMMA with her unique pragmatic touch to focus on the essence of the all prevailing reality raised the elementary questions, “What is this?” and “What essentially subsists in this given order?” To put the very same issues, posers in AMMA’S inimitable vernacular idiom “Idi Emiti?” running into five alphabets only very much like the prescribed ‘Panchakshari’. AMMA closely followed this with another query “Asalu Idi Emiti?” This also runs into eight alphabets in the vernacular like the traditional ‘Ashtakshari’. These questions are framed in simple, common sense diction of everyday use for everyone by AMMA in utter simplicity easy for everyone’s understanding.
Even so, these seemingly simple posers stir the mind of the lesser mortal. He reflects deeply and quite likely contemplates on this existing order, its nature and causation. Brother Raju too earnestly responded likewise. He began pondering over these elemental, crucial issues of life temporal as also spiritual.
He recounts his innate feelings and relates the delectable experience, equally stirring moment of being fed by AMMA personally, a rare unique experience for the entire life span of the individual.
To begin with, his ever often troubled mind got into an ecstatic rapture that day, that very moment. This is the benevolent effect of AMMA’S feeding him as he very soon begins to realize. He finds the food laced with AMMA’S love and saturated with HER sublime affection of the mother, personal as also universal, for AMMA deemed all of us as HER very own children. AMMA declared. “I brought forth all of you into this world, yet gave you to different mothers for upbringing.”
Further, Brother Raju moves ahead and confides that the feed he has from MOTHER tastes like it is sourced from the very nectar that is truly divine. Thus, AMMA graced him with verve and vitality enabling him to forge ahead in this worldly strife. He discloses that overall he is given a wondrous, delightful ecstatic unique feeling.
After a consequent deeper introspection, Brother Raju is convinced that AMMA is the source, cause and effect of this entire cosmic order and there is little else to be appreciated or understood by the lesser mortal. If so, AMMA is verily the ‘HOW’. ‘WHY’ and ‘WHAT’ of this existence in all respects or all of its aspects.
Prompted by such ecstatic revelation Brother Raju ponders whether feeding him is AMMA’S unique, divine prescription to pull through this worldly sojourn. Could this be the beacon of life unfolding the basic issues of life and the given order as to the rudiments of existence like the ‘HOW’, ‘WHY’ and ‘WHAT’ of this extant order that subsists ever with little pause continually. Do we understand the intrigue of this relentless, overbearing cosmic order, the creation as it is?
After this deep reflection, meaningful introspection that morsel fed to him pulsates with AMMA’s divine touch. His every utterance now resonates with devotional feelings towards AMMA. Could my feeling be true that AMMA is prompting, guiding, steering, mentoring my life’s course?
Doubtless this is truly so though not often directly beheld, perceived or realized as such. Brother Raju concludes his song with the firm belief that AMMA is shaping his ends and leading his every stride on this earth. Granting this, from now on Brother Raju’s footfalls are always towards AMMA and in such a path during this little earthly sojourn.
Pray AMMA in abject submission and total surrender seeking HER grace ever and always.
(Adapted from Brother Mannava Butchi Raju Sarma’s ‘ANUBHAVA SARAM’, Song No.47, “Emi? Idi Emi?” Page No.51.
Also under grateful acknowledgement to ‘LO CHOOPU’ by Brother
A.V.R.Subramanyam and Brother Ravuri Prasad)