(rendered into English by
Dr. Shanta Sista)
“I exist for you” is my 13th song composed on 9-4-1957 and 11-4-1957.
“I exist for you
None have I on this earth (except for you)”
This is the burden of the song.
When I state “nee korake nenunnanu” it means that I live for her. It also implies that without her I am not, I have no life of my own.
When I say “nuvvu” i.e. you, I am not referring to Anasuyamma and when I say “nenu” I, it is not myself or Raju. When there is “nuvvu” – you there is “nenu” – I too. “I” means the being that is present in “you” and “you” is your presence in me. This is the other meaning.
The immutable blue sky is your pure equal vision
Il You are the earth that is the prop
You reared me with (great) love II
This is the first verse.
“Gaganam gaganakaram sagaram sagaropam’ says Sage Valmiki. There is no object that can be compared with either the ocean or the sky. So Valmiki states “the sky is like the sky and the ocean is like the ocean.” The sky, the ocean and Mother are incomparable. Mother is like Mother.
Gaganam is the sky, the space that enables the creation and the sustenance to take place. “The immutable sky” is Mother’s will without intention (sankalpa rahit rahoittamaa aina sankalpa m), or a project without a plan; the thought that she has to become many. Because she is everything she has the equal impartial vision.
“You are the earth, the prop” (aadharambau avanivi). The earth is the support and livelihood of all living beings; you are the basis for all the pairs of opposites – perfect nature and its deformed aspect. (beautiful) form and the uglier aspect, virtues and vices – Mother is the support for all this. That is the reason why she respects everything, treats and supports everything with kindness and compassion.
You are the movement of the wind
You are the flame of the fire
You are the cleansing aspect of the water
You are the embodiment of patience. The noblest quality.
This is the second verse. Anila is wind, Anala fire, Salila water. The nature of wind is its movement, of fire to emit heat and light, of water its cleansing capacity. Water is a universal solvent. Mother is the Ganges that draws out all the dross from the innermost core of the being and purifies. Patience is the most powerful quality that is far superior to all the natural attributes that are associated with the five elements. Patience is the very breath of worship (upasana), devotion and penance. Penance is the only mode or path to gain the knowledge of the Supreme (brahma jnana). Patience is the necessary virtue to be cultivated till the right time (tarunam) comes. The earth is the visible form of this patience (which appears static) and Mother is the dynamic form of patience in human form with all her limbs (karacharana) moving about (amongst us).
Il Your look is a musical rendering
Of the notes that emerge from the beautiful Veena
You are the Truth eternal
You are the omnipresent Brahman II
This is the third verse. “Nee avalokane aalapana”, Your look is a musical rendering… When I made this statement what I meant is that the very darshan of Mother liberates the individuals i.e., they attain the supreme state of Bliss. “Sundara veena naadamu neevani” the melodious notes that emerge from the beautiful veena the melody of the veena is the sound of the Vedas, the delightful, rhythmic, musical notes of the profound thoughts. According to me that is Mother. Music therapy is popular these days. When the strings of the veena are plucked the rhythmic sound waves that emanate have an impact on the disturbed state of the body and mind and impart peace and serenity in the person. Along with the steadiness (of the body) comes the steadfastness of the mind, is the principle.
There is a specific order direction and condition in the process of creation. For example there is a method in the formation of seasons and inter-dependence of the animate and inanimate objects for their livelihood. In this providential ordinance (vidhi vidhanam) Mother is the melodious undercurrent tune of the flute (vamsi naadam).
You are the Truth Eternal
You are the omnipresent Brahman
I said. In this context I should explain a unique (from our point of view) Truth which is very natural for Mother. It is difficult to understand Mother. Looking at it from one perspective, we should not conclude that this is Mother’s nature, message, the range, the method, the tradition. Mother is the glowing light that has miriad angles that shine in infinite ways.
Mother is a bundle of paradoxes. In her we find simultaneously the traditional approach of a vedantin and the arguments of an atheist. She questions the human efforts (purushakaaram) and challenges the male ego (purusha ahamkara). She sets an example for matrimonial fidelity (Aacharan Satmaka pativratalu) and at the same time she is emphatic about the equality between men and women. One wonders whether she is a feminist !!
When she exhorts us to perceive the divine even in impure objects (ashuddham – literal meaning human excrement) and to make cow dung balls called “sande gobbemmalu” and worship them as Mangala Gouri (Goddess Parvathy) she is revealing to us the secret and the sublime goal of life (viz bliss), hidden in the ancient dharma and its practice in a nutshell, and making it as easy and simple as a peeled banana ready for immediate consumption.
Immediately after supporting the ancient tradition, She declares like an atheist and a rationalist that the days (tithi – fifteen names are given to the fifteen days in a fortnight according to the lunar calendar) cannot change the fate or destiny of a man; the emotions and feelings of likes and dislikes and not the planetary movement, are responsible for the behavior of human beings. And she is the prop of both, (the traditional view and the rationalistic view). When she asks us to discriminate between true and false through the question “What is this?”, “In actuality what is this?” She appears as the Truth seeker (satyanveshi). But when she declares there are no births it comes as a great electric shock because it is like a strong blow that shakes the very foundation of the beliefs which have been ingrained in our very blood and marrow of the bones. If one were to listen to the novel interpretation and definition of the words “punistree” (a married woman whose husband is still alive) and “ardhanareeswara tatvam”, the concept of half woman and half man as a single body (like the Shiva Parvathy combination) one’s breath will stop. But Mother’s words have an authenticity because they come from the crucible of experience.
One knows that Mother is a Hindu because of her way of dressing and the vermillion mark on her forehead. But she declares “my religion is the unity of all religions.” She respects all religions and the wishes of all people. She approves of all methods and practices and nothing hurts her or disturbs her.
“Ye yatha mam prapadyante tams tathaiva bhajamyaham” meaning whoever worships me through whatever path, I accept them and bless them. Mother holds a mirror to individual natures and forms. Everything is Mother but no single aspect or quality is Mother. This firm unshakable belief is the Truth. Therefore I say
You are the Truth eternal
You are the omnipresent
Brahman Brahman Truth Knowledge and Infinity (Satyam, Jnanam Anantam Brahma) That is Mother.