Human life obviously passes through the triple stages of childhood, adolescence and matured, ripe old age in almost all cases with little exception. As the age advances the individual goes through bachelorhood, marital life, and the passing old age of exit. To suit these phases of life that pass off for everyone our andent order the Sanahtana Dharma, well defined the three stages of life into bachelorhood, householder, and the ripe old man: verily Brhamacharya, Grihastha and the final ending Vanaprastha.
Renowned life, Sanyasa is the fourth order, the uncommon choice of life which a very minor like-minded proportion of the populace pick up. This is almost a singular, negligible minority. AMMA defined ‘Sanyasa’ as the state not much affected by the senses and the agitation of desire. To cite AMMA, “Sanyasa is sans Irritability”. To darify beyond the sensuous obsession that is far too common. Let us set aside this exceptional minority for a while from the purview of this presentation
AMMA stressed upon the role of the householder. This is HER general prescribed mode of life for most, all and sundry. The householder sustains the family which is the bedrock of the stable social order. Quite a few sociological studies revealed that family affiliation and such bondages are stronger in the Asian countries. The overall oriental situation as compared to the occidental. This is somewhat a consoling cause for stability viewed positively as conveyed by them.
The householder is the usual bread. winner, and the family is the food provider for all the other segments of the people. AMMA highlighted the family and the householder. SHE pronounced that she married only to allay the apprehension of the family that is a hindrance to spiritual life and advancement. If only to substantiate this stance, AMMA married, begot children and very well played the role of the dutiful householder in all glory exemplifying the same for the contemporaries as also the posterity.
Here again AMMA stuck a new note and trod on a novel path. AMMA stated that marriage is the mode, the very institution that brings together the man and woman in the holy wedlock, opening the door for the holy matrimony. SHE proceeded further bringing in a role for the husband and wife in the family situation.
First and foremost, it is the forum in which both husband and wife share their feelings, emotions, and thoughts in all purity, bridging a lasting bondage and subsisting equation that is mutually supportive. In such amity, the husband endures the wife and all her person joyously and the wife supports the husband and the progeny in the worldly life bringing them up well making the family live happily.In course of such living, they both savor all flavors of life as also give them up eventually duly enjoying the same.
Here AMMA ushered in a new note of gender equality while the earlier disparity and male superiority receded into the background. In the family as the relations evolve, the husband too regards the wife as a deity when the marital relation culminates in its finality. If the husband is the person to be revered and esteemed, the wife too does not lag is equally meriting the reverence of the husband. Such is the acme of the culminating equation that blossoms bestowing mutual enrichment, esteem, equally so the fulfillment.
In the process both lead a value based exemplary life that supports harmonious living and significantly adds value to the society. The wife in all attention minds the hearth and home serving those who call at home in an equation of sharing with others what little they have, partaking the same in person to their heart’s content. Such living causes a sharing, caring society precluding tensions and strife.
Furthermore, in such definition of marriage and role clarity there is no case for gender claims, superiority and the so-called liberation of women. Foregoing premises when followed and complied with in life, they cause amity, harmony, and absolute ease of living. Rival claims for mutual dominance cease to be, almost nonexistent.
Goodness is the glorious way reckoned in AMMA’S precepts. It is pronounced, “Goodness excels every other mystique”. Simple goodness in living and the basic ethic to be observed elevates the living, uplifting both the wife and the husband.
Continued, well observed good, ethical living, that is following one’s own duty (swadharma) enhances life and the being primarily without much ado. It is apt to recall the legends of the chaste Lady and the mindful Dharmavyadha conveyed in the epic Mahabharata. Simple virtuous living bestows spiritual benefits too and endows the quite common individual extraordinarily which such continued practice and experience suggest to the subject. This living way borders spirituality unawares, adding an extra dimension to life.
Now to continue this line of thought family brings progeny. Bringing forth children and bringing them up worthwhile is another expectation, the obligatory function of the family. That is to rear children into worthy, useful citizens and social beings.
This requirement is taken care of in the usual course given an ideal family base which lives amicably and fruitfully. Children primarily learn by imitation even from early childhood. When the parents are dutiful, harmonious, sharing and caring in an ideal, value based mode, a worthy example is set for the children to observe, follow for sincere compliance.
Marriage as defined by AMMA, the role clarity of the wife and husband conveyed in the marital life contains all the seeds of living well and fruitfully for themselves as also for the good of the society. One needs to appreciate that AMMA’S quotes on marriage are not mere precepts, or the ideals of marriage cited. They are the basic prescriptions and prerequisites for social good, stability and harmony.
To be more precise the intrinsic essence of ‘Vasudhaika Kutumbam’ and such core values are all well contained, implied in AMMA’S aphorisms of marriage. So are the values enshrined in marriage and to be imbibed in family life.
Living the life of the householder in terms of AMMA’S precepts and the related AMMA’S aphorisms causes domestic bliss for the entire family. Much more so contributes to harmony and welfare in the society in the present context of discord and eroding values.