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The Silent Initiation

Ekkirala Bharadwaja
Magazine : Matrusri English
Language : English
Volume Number : 1
Month : July
Issue Number : 2
Year : 1966

What is it that draws one again and again to the Mother’s presence, once he has visited. Her?

She does not perform miracles; she does not lecture; she does not exhort; she does not say that if she is visited again and again, success temporal or spiritual accrues. She might have done all these or may do but not as many others do; none but those who experience them know it. Still one goes there again and again. Why?

Recently a lecturer in a college came to see the Mother for the first time. He is an earnest seeker of spiritual illumination; he travelled far and wide visiting several holy men and shrines; he did not get re al solace anywhere. Here, in Mother’s presence he found that and explicitly said so. Most of the time during his stay, She sat silent. Her presence and her silence gave him the solace which he could not get anywhere else. This can be taken as a typical illustration of how and why people rush to her again and again.

Why does one feel in her presence so enchanted? There is not a more powerful magic wand than love that spell bounds the mind once and for all. All love as we understand it in the world of ours, might enchant us but only for a time; for it is based on certain preferences, agreement of temperments and most commonly on mutual self-interest. And therefore does it fail to give lasting solace that swallows up all other vexations and anxieties. It is at the most, one of the many activities of the mind and the heart. But the love which one finds in Mother’s presence is like the key to one’s own heart for which he searched in vain in the world outside. To put it more precisely, one finds in her the very perfection of his own self, as he ideally wishes to be. It is as though She were the original of himself and he only her likeness. It is recognition of one and the same both within and without. This does not happen anywhere- else, and hence one’s experi- ence in Mother’s presence defies any attempt at expressing in words of common experience. That love speaks straight with one’s faster than any language can express. Her appeal to the visitor to partake of food, her Soothing touch and word-all These are but later translations and peacemealing of that infi- nite love which cannot be recaptured in normal recolle- etion, in terms of what one’s mind is accustomed to under- stand in the world outside. What else can that true and infinite love be than Love that is God and God that is Love itself?

Willing or unwilling one might be to yield to the call of the Mother after one’s first visit to her, slowly and impercetpi bly but surely does she become the central thought. the bright sun in the firmamment of one’s heart before which all other attachments and thoughts pale into insignificance.

Then starts an interesting story. The inner pull grows stronger. Sometimes the circumstances strangely conspire against their victim-only to further strengthen the inner pull; for whether he recognises it or not as such, what happens to him mentally is what Sastras describe Tapas as heart, (pining away for God-Realiza tion with unflinching faith and perseverance); it is what Sadhakas (Spiritual apprentices) call concentration- it is what Sufis and Western mystics call Remembrance. What happens inwardly at that time is in fact the end product of incessant repetition of God’s name for a long time. Here it happens in a short time.

It is with equal strangeness that in spite of unsurmountable impediments that one is wafted into the presence of the Mother by a strange turn of events. Depending on the nature of one’s mind, changes manifest themselves inwardly; the hold of vices is slackened: one might experience self-illuminating thoughts which mally he is incapable of getting: one might experience visions and dreams; still another might experience her immediate presence while staying at a hundred miles from Jillellamudi. Some find that many of their long vexing problems get solved either after the visit or even at the con- templation of a visit. Stran- ger than all these are those who see Mother long before they even hear of her, recogni- tion dawning upon them when they actually visit her.

What all this points to is this-that hearing about Mother or visiting her often marked a nor- new phase or a new turn in one’s life, a phase distinguished by numerous witnesses to Mether’s constant care and help in matters spiritual or temporal. For did she not define Asirvachana’ i.e. Blessing as being inexpressible and undefinable Anirvacha niyam” And is not one’s experience of one-ness with the Absoulte described as being incomparable and expressible in the Sastras and scriptures of the world?


(1) What a pity! My boy has also failed in his examination, and my daughter is almost always suffering from a bad head-ache. I am not able to help my childrern. dear lady. what can I do for yours? 



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