Every night in my life
Is a count down from ten to zero
I, like a space-craft, hurtle into sinister space
And I leave myself, as it does the earth,
My existence, a self-abandoned thought!
I’m like the lonely spaceman
In a lonely space-craft
That has lost its contact with those below,
That has been fired too far into space
To permit safe return to my home below.
My air and my food
Run shorter and shorter;
I drift in the weightlessness
Of living death, a mere thought
In the minds of those below.
Mother, Earth is far from me!
She’s like the unreachable moon,
An unfulfilled longing that ne’er
Might come true; She looks on
As I am sucked into the depths of Space.
Every night in my life
Is a count down from ten to zero
With bated breath and pounding heart,
I feel the dreaded moment approach
Till, helplessly, I’m hurtled round
Into the orbit again, my cries
Muffled in the blast below!
I float and drift in the stillness
Of eternal space, weightless.
I’m caught in the orbit of dreadful
Thoughts and fears; the whole shot,
How cruel, and how ruthless!
God! an innocent brother of mine
Gets prepared for this imaginary honour
And they with a demonic grin, cheer him!
They that seem all love and care for him.
Prepare for his honours and his funeral!
We are the victims of our love
For the distant star that shines;
And in bidding for it, we pledge ourselves
To living death, and die while still alive!!
***
Your goodness brings tears to my Eyes. Abuse and even beating won’t